I was going to try for a play on "blast from the past," but then I ended up with "crast from the past," and that's just no good. Maybe "crapst from the past." Yeah, that has a ring to it.
First, a disclaimer: I AM NOT ACTUALLY A HOARDER. I JUST HAVE ISSUES. WITH THROWING AWAY STUFF. SOMETIMES. Typically, I collect bits and pieces of things I find really interesting for a couple years, then struggle to throw it all away. . . I had a brain wave before moving back from MIT and took pictures of anything that made me sad to throw out (but was pretty sure I had no reason to keep.) Yeah, I could have scanned some of this stuff and gotten better quality pictures, but the picture-taking process leaves bonus relics of the time and the place I did it in, which at some point I suspect I will value more than what the pictures purport to be of.
The primary thing I threw out was in fact around 150 cards received while at college, from various relatives, but mainly my mom. Mom: Showing her love with seasonal cards since 2006. (actually well before that, but you get the idea.)
And now. . . a tour through the crap I no longer possess! (The image above is of the practice casts we made of various body parts in 4.302 in wax and plaster. . . so there is an unpleasant closeup of my upper lip. Damn I loved that class.)
I love Orbit gum, and I loved this packaging run. Why did you have to end it, Orbit??
The last week has brought a bounty of shoes. Maybe I have too many pairs; I have 12, three of which are primarily for walking, including one pair that I will throw away as soon as I have a replacement. (O, Roos, you have served me well. So many miles have a walked in thee. The necessity of the replacement unfortunately became quite apparent after my 6.7 mile walk today -- ouch, blisters.)
The first pair is from H&M (predictably enough). I now have a black pair of heels (which need some repair work, erk) and brown pair.
The second pair is. . . wearable boots! By which I mean comfortable boots! Not only are they comfortable, they're real leather! Not only are they comfortable and real leather, they're cute! O happy day! (Ignore the blue socks, dammit. I wanted to be comfortable but not horrifically schlumpy today. . .which led to a button-up shirt. . . which led to a skirt. . . which led to knee-highs. Gah.)
I don't watch very many movies. I can't pin down a precise reason, except maybe that I am usually uncomfortable watching violence or sex (unless there's a compelling reason for it to be onscreen) or bad comedy, which means that most current movies are just out.
Shades of last term: Wandering the Internet, the sky dark through the hints of glass on the fourth floor in the main buildings, the windows and skylights reflecting the light of monitors and fluorescent fixtures back down on the startling number of students who are far from their beds at 1:00 AM on a Monday morning.
But they are doing their own work, and I am merely printing a poster for the Shakespeare Ensemble (which I am not technically involved in anymore, but given that 50% of Fenway still is, I decided to be friendly.) There is something weirdly liberating about being out at 1 AM when you don't have to be, as opposed to being out at 1 AM because you have work left to do. Last term I pretty much felt. . . trapped, every time I walked into studio. Staying up into the small hours of the night working is made that much more desolate when you are a mile from home.
I am deeply puzzled by the pset I am supposed to be doing right now. This means. . . I should blog.
What to do for Lent? (yes, I realize I'm a bit late.) Last year I gave up pop, and took up incessant swearing. This year I would like to do something a bit more proactive and hopefully less detrimental to my temperament. I was thinking about trying to read a chapter of a book of the Bible every day and trying to implement something from it in my life that day or the next. (I would also find the "look up the cross-references and historical background" part of this fun.)
This should probably include praying. I suck at prayer. Prayer requires two things from me that I do not care for: a) Effort in an area I'm not already good at and b) faith that it will matter. I'm okay with the whole chatting-about-my-life-with-God thing (when I remember), but I'm not so hot on the ask-for-this-and-it-shall-be-given-to-you part. I don't know what's good to ask for (the trip to Italy is probably out, getting As in all my classes is probably sketchy, and asking to be a better Christian makes me doubt my own sincerity), and I'm not very confident that my prayer will make a difference in someone else's life. This is probably because I always suspect that if I'm praying for someone, it's because I'm too much of a chickenbutt to actually do something for him or her myself. (See: Sad, lonely, nasty people that I don't really want to try with but wish God would make less of a problem for me.)
And theoretically God is supposed to be answering these prayers. How? As someone who has been a Christian for three-ish years now, I'm still uncertain about the actual mechanism. Will I be poked to read relevant Bible verses? Will I get some kind of premonition? Will words be put in the mouth of someone close to me? Do I just have to sort of guess and hope? (I'm afraid it's the last one, which I find depressing.) Frankly, at this point in my life, I feel like God is just saying to me, "Kiddo, I'm just going to wait to talk to you until you're a little less deaf and a little more perceptive."
Bleurgh.
Anyhow, what book should I look at? Some of the histories are decidedly difficult to apply, though I like the Old Testament, and sometimes Paul just gets on my nerves. I'm thinking maybe Isaiah, or a re-reading of Psalms (except they would both be MONUMENTAL.) I do like the Old Testament, because I have a better sense of actual human beings moving around underneath the words; unfortunately, this also makes certain books (Joshua comes to mind) a challenge to my faith, because sometimes I have a hard time seeing the people as being motivated by God rather than by their own weaselly plans. I also (I think) have only read one complete Gospel, which are rather markedly important, so maybe I will just go with Mark or Luke.
I also feel like maybe I should complement this somewhat introspective study with a more obvious outward effort to be a better and (perhaps) more responsible person. A sincere compliment to someone different every day? Doing my homework a couple days ahead of time? Trying to volunteer my time somewhere each week? (I get a fair amount of emails from the Public Service Center, as well as "please help us make food!" messages from all different places.)
I love Orbit gum, and I loved this packaging run. Why did you have to end it, Orbit??
